Cannibals

If you haven’t felt like this at one time or another, you obviously haven’t worked anywhere I have! :)

Recently, a large corporation hired several cannibals to increase their diversity, ‘You are all part of our team now,’ said the Human Resources rep during the welcoming briefing. ‘You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don’t eat any employees.’

The cannibals promised they would not.

Four weeks later their boss remarked, ‘You’re all working very hard and I’m satisfied with your work. We have noticed a marked increase in the whole company’s performance. However, one of our secretaries has disappeared.  Do any of you know what happened to her?’

The cannibals all shook their heads, ‘No.’

After the boss had left, the leader of the cannibals said to the others,

‘Which one of you idiots ate the secretary?’

A hand rose hesitantly.

‘You fool!’ the leader continued.

‘For four weeks we’ve been eating managers and no one noticed anything. But NOOOooo, you had to go and eat someone who actually does something.’

Dogs are funny

It always amazes me to see my dogs’ personalities. They are hilarious.

Take tonight for example. I got home from work about 20 minutes ago and they were freaking out. Somehow, they know the “beep” my car makes when I lock it. So I hear them barking before I even get to the door. I walk in the front door, walk thru the living room and dining room and they’re just going NUTS from the kitchen, where my parents must have put them for the night (some nights they sleep with me, sometimes in the kitchen in their plush bed, sometimes with my parents). I had made the decision that if they were in the kitchen, they’d stay there tonight so I can sleep in! Otherwise, they usually wake me up by 7 or so. Well, these dogs had other plans.

I open the gate and walk into the kitchen and they go absolutely nuts (as they always do). It’s always nice to come home to these creatures who love me unconditionally. That’s what is so awesome about dogs.

Anyways, Gizmo just wanted to be scratched, and Bandit kept trying to attack my face with kisses. I try to get him to sit before this happens, but, tonight like many others, he just kept jumping up and wanting some lovin’. I told him he had to sit nicely like Giz before I’d play with him and he got mad. He ran to his bed where he had some chew toys hidden (I swear that bed had bones I haven’t seen in years… they hide bones in their blankets all the time). and grabbed one, ran to me, growled and ran back to the bed. I was so confused. Normally, when he wants to play fetch, he’ll drop the toy next to me. He just kept doing that – bringing the toy near me, and then running back to the bed and howling at me.

I couldn’t help it. I just started laughing. I think that pissed him off cuz then his howls/barks got more intense. Meanwhile, Giz was laying on his back, trying to get my attention for more tummy-scratching.

I finally gave up on trying to figure out what Bandit wanted and went to wash my face/brush my teeth, etc. When I came back to the kitchen, they were sitting in their bed, just staring at me. I looked at them and said, “Goodnight boys. And don’t think you’re coming up tonight. I need to sleep.”

When I opened the gate to the upstairs, they BOLTED and before I knew it they were at the top of the stairs waiting for me. LOL they totally had other plans.

Now, they’re passed out on my bed, content as ever.

Dogs are so funny.

Doggone Wild

Here’s a video from MyFoxKC. Let’s just say things got a little out of hand during a bump shot of some puppies.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AvOawWrx2c]